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lloyd cole / antidepressant
i’m gonna have to leave work early today, trek down to the electric fetus pick up the new disk and wrap myself in the moody wonderfulness that is mr cole.
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the other day i caught a new rock-n-roll interview show on hbo called off the record – while i won’t comment much regarding the show (other than to say it’s excellent), i will say it caused me to pull out a record i haven’t listened to in some time – u2’s achtung baby.
the impetus for pulling out what could arguably be called u2’s strongest album was the tune acrobat. there is a moment in the hbo show where the audience is allowed to ask questions and someone wanted to know about the story behind ‘acrobat’. as much as ‘acrobat’ is probably my favorite u2 song, when i pulled out the album today, i was struck by another track – the dark, sensual and mysterious love is blindness.
love is clockworks / and cold steel / fingers too numb to feel / squeeze the handle / blow out the candle / love is blindness
this track is truly unlike anything that comes before it on the album (and that’s saying something considering the “kitchen sink” production style on the album). from the opening organ swell (who the hell is playing the organ), to what can best be described as lush bass line and rolling percussion you know this somber track is going in a different direction than what came before.
there has been much debate on what this song is about… is it simply a love song (in the most obvious fashion)? is it about the edge’s marriage failing? is it about terrorism? i wouldn’t be surprised if it were a fragile mix of all three.
love is drowning / in a deep well / all the secrets / and no one to tell / take the money / honey / blindness
out of that opening of organ, bass & percussion, comes a voice that honest-to-god sounds broken and bruised. buried just beneath the tortured, disturbing lament of the lyric, the haunting guitar begins a tentative wail. now, the edge is one of those rock-n-roll guitarists i’ve never thought much about – yeah sure he’s great, a solid-go-to-guy – but he’s never been (i thought) what drew me to u2. until the interview on hbo the other night – a great amount of time was spent discussing the edge’s “sound”. fuck, what an idiot i’ve been. listening with fresh ears i’ve come to a conclusion…. the sound of u2 has very little to do with bono as i had always (foolishly) thought – indeed, it’s all wrapped up in how the edge plays his guitar…. with ‘blindness’ in particular he makes his guitar cry. it’s really quite the perfect mix between adam clayton‘s tight as a piano string bass line, larry mullen’s perfect drumming and the edge’s sublime (yes, cb, i said sublime) guitar (in my estimation, the best guitar solo the edge has ever done). bono’s vox weaves in and out, never pulling focus – rather adding to the story.
love is blindness / in a parked car / in a crowded street / you see your love / made complete / thread is ripping / the knot is slipping / love is blindness
the song is the brilliant cap to a phenomenal album. it’s sobering clarity (and simple instrumentation) puts the rest of the album’s heavily produced and programmed sound into perfect perception. the cacophony of sounds that is the opening track, zoo station, slowly evolves over the course of album and fades into the organ that slowly, tightly and oh so powerfully powers love is blindness.
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not sure if it’s the change in seasons, but i’ve been ready for bed at 6pm lately – exceedingly tired… i’ve never put a lot of stock in that whole seasonal tired disorder thing, but i’m beginning to understand it.
my body better fuckin’ adapt and soon…. i’m used to living with very little sleep – i don’t like bein’ tired all the time.
on the plus side to weather; minneapolis is experiencing a late fall thunderstorm. i love me some thunder and lightening… drove into work this morning cranking new order (shocked?) watching the sky light up with explosions. on the bad side, tomorrow all this will turn to snow. i’m so not ready for winter yet.
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a short history (with notes provided by wikipedia, new order online and q magazine):
inspired by a sex pistol’s gig in 1976 (interesting how many bands were begun after seeing the pistol’s drunkenly swagger through a rock-n-roll show), three friends from manchester england (bernard sumner, peter hook & terry mason) formed what would become joy division (originally titled stiff kittens and then warsaw; either one a great name if you ask me – picture it “ladies & gentlemen, please put your hands together for stiff kittens”). an advert in a manchester record store brought ian curtis into the mix and the band was solidified (sort of). fast forward 9 months and 3 drummers later – a young stephen morris was installed as drummer and the stage was set.
joy division offered a darker, more complex version of what was happening in the london punk scene. whereas punk was enthusiastically blunt, loud and aggressive; joy division offered a more solitary and bleaker version of the future. indeed; modern ambient giants such as aphex twin, massive attack and the orb owe as much to 1979’s unknown pleasures and 1980’s closer as they do to the works of erik satie, pink floyd & phillip glass.
in 1980 ian curtis’ health (read: depression) was reaching dangerous proportions. on may 18, on the eve of joy division’s inaugural u.s. tour, curtis reportedly watched werner herzog’s stroszek — with the final scene suggesting the main character’s suicide— and hanged himself – therefore sealing himself in the rock-n-roll pantheon of tortured artiste.
while agreements were made between members of the band prior to curtis’ suicide to disband should any member leave – the band would dissolve, the three remaining members of joy division continued to tour the summer after curtis’ death and even went back into the studio and recorded a number of tracks. with the album closer released posthumously (to excellent reviews), and the track “love will tear us apart” lodged solidly in the top 20, sumner, hook & morris, emerged re-born as new order.
taking their new name from an entry in the guardian entitled “the people’s new order of kampuchea” and adding gillian gilbert (morris’ girlfriend at the time) on keyboards and synthesizers, the band released the songs “ceremony” and “in a lonely place”; the last tracks recorded as joy division and then immediately went into the studio to work on what would become 1981’s movement album.
movement, released november 1981 featured what would become one of new order’s signature tracks; “temptation”. while similar in style to joy divisions dark tones, “temptation” and the rest of movement hinted at a more spirited, more electronic, more dance oriented future sound. one could even say “temptation” was almost whimsical – a great departure from the dark path of “atmosphere” from the joy division days.
the final nail in the coffin of joy division however came in 1983 with the arrival of power, corruption and lies. the electronic tip of the iceberg found on movement came to the forefront here. with their more guitar based sound now embracing and mixing fully with electronic/techno music, along with abstract / nonsense lyrics, new order was fully formed.
the cornerstone to power, corruption and lies was “blue monday” (the 12″ single becoming the biggest selling 12″ in the history of music). “blue monday’s” ominous kick drum opening, throbbing synth-bass line (produced on a moog, then overlaid with hook’s physical bass guitar lead) and sumner’s dead-pan lyrical styling’s is often seen as one of the most critical crossover hit’s of the 80’s new wave scene. indeed in 2003, q magazine voted “blue Monday” the 9th most influential song ever (and the only dance track in the top ten).
20 years on from power, corruption & lies (and another 7 albums later; low-life, brotherhood, substance, technique, republic, get ready and waiting for the sirens call), new order have become ‘god-like geniuses’ (nme 2005)… a band that was radical for it’s time and continues to inspire people to pick up a guitar or turn on a keyboard, has, for now, gone quietly into the night.
the nice thing about new order tho’ is you never know if the end is really the end. with these blokes the end is usually just the beginning.
new order – true faith
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that beautiful beautiful man summed up something i’ve been struggling with for a long time. how to properly communicate my distaste for myspace – check it out:
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i used to think that i was a pretty average gay man, i like the hotties, i like dance music, i like sex – but the realization that i’m not your typical gay man has been creeping into my consciousness quite a bit lately.
i’ll give you a few examples:
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joe.my.god has a clip of a music video by brian kent (former mr nyc eagle)… now on all surface levels, i should dig the clip; i do enjoy a well produced dance tune, i do enjoy a woofy man such as mr kent and i’m all for jumping on the band wagon for man on man action in a video (seriously underrepresented in the music video milieu if you ask me) – but the song is just terrible. seriously. reminds me of bad marky mark dance music from the early 90’s. i have a phrase for music such as this: “euro-fag dance music”. the music is all beat with no interesting phrasing or structure to it. there’s just nothing here except the over-the-top beat and diva-esque vocal stylings of mr kent. why is it that every gay man on the planet seems to love this shit except me? must not be gay enough. i pride myself on having a pretty eclectic and well-rounded musical interests – but these super gay tunes are (for the most part) just fuckin’ terrible. thankfully, joe redeemed his blog with the glorious remembrance of ruth brown he has also posted.
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there are a couple of blogs out here from gentlemen in southern area of the u.s who seem woefully attuned to just their penises with nary a thought or concern for anything other than getting laid. i’ll not name names for a couple of reasons: a) karma kicks ass and i’m sure it would come round and lay a boot upside my ass in a hurry and b) i realize that what we put out in the blog-o-sphere is just one aspect of our personalities (hopefully) and that what these two bloggers represent is probably (hopefully) not the full dimension of their lives. however – with that said, surly being gay doesn’t mean that we think about is sex and we’re throwing ourselves at other bloggers via their comment boxes in a continual trashy manner. or does it? maybe being gay is just about getting as much tail as possible. and sure, there is nothing wrong with flirting – god knows i do my fair share of flirting – but hopefully i’m also putting out into the universe the vibe that there is more to me than just my dick. these bloggers i’m talking about seem to be overly predicated on the concept that sex is all there is.
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while on the subject of sex; lets talk about casual sex. firstly, let it be stated that i’ve done it (and chances are i’ll do it again), but here’s the deal – i don’t get much out of casual sex. yes, tab a goes into slot b and that takes care of a base animal instinct/human need. i get that (and fully support the concept of tabs and slots), but for me just simply taking care of the base instinct leaves me a bit hollow. my lack of taste for casual sex does not (as some will indicate) mean that i’m a prude or that i have puritanical views of sex. nor does it mean, if you like casual sex, that you are a slut. it just means we have different views on sex (and one might say intimacy). for me, the casual sex situations that have been the most rewarding are those where you meet someone and the pure magnetism of the situation compels you to ditch your clothes and go at it like wildebeests in heat. i like that. i like that a lot actually. what i don’t like is finding someone in a bar (or online) and kinda going “eh, it’ll work” or “i’m so fuckin‘ horny, he’ll do”. yes, i’ve done it. no it doesn’t do much for me. sex (for me) should be wild and intimate and intense and rewarding. not hollow and empty. if the feeling after sex is worse than before, then what’s the point?
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drugs. ok, on this point, i’m completely comfortable being separate from the pack. i don’t get meth or coke or crystal. these substances, if you ask me, are bringing about the downfall of modern gay life. these drugs do not make life better, in-fact they destroy it. i find it to be a dichotomy that circuit parties are raising funds for hiv/aids organizations all around, yet, the meth and crystal scene is so prevalent at circuit parties. it’s been pretty well established that meth and crystal use is linked with syphilis and hiv infection rates raising. i just don’t get the whole drugs and party atmosphere concept.
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bars. another thing i’m just not big on is gay bars. i go out a few times every couple of months to remind myself what it was like. a big reason i don’t do the bar thing is that i’m pretty shy. i get that it’s half me. i really do. but lets say i wanna hang out with my friends on a saturday night, go to a bar and have a few beers – that’s all good right? what usually seems to happen is that someone in the group (or some people) end up ditching the friend group and go hook up with a hottie across the dance floor. is it just me or is that just kinda bullshit? if i’m in a bar with my buddies – i wanna hang out with my buddies. it annoys the shit out of me when someone ditches the group to go get laid. nothing wrong with flirting or dancing or what not, but i hate being ditched. it’s a fundamental part of who i am (and for the record, i totally get the psychological aspect of the issue) – it’s still not cool.
clint mansell’s amazing score for the sublimely beautiful film ‘the fountain’


